Do you think he loves his ex more than he loves you?
You know your husband loves you. At least you are absolutely confident he does. He does things that no man could do unless he really did love you. He puts up with things that only a loving husband could tolerate. He dotes on you, he takes care of you, he babies you; of course, he loves you.
But there is always one little area that can make your skin crawl. There is one subject that brings out the worse in you every time you hear it brought up. You don’t want to feel that way but you have no control over your instinctive emotions. Your friends try to convince you you’re not being practical, you’re not giving him the benefit of the doubt. Their words fall on deaf ears; you hear what you want and let the rest take place.
You hear so much contradictory discussion that maybe you should call a psychic. A psychic may be able to help you wade through the confusion of blurring emotions and frightened thoughts. They can help you see beyond your normal range of sight. They will show you how to analyze your imagination and how to interpret your thoughts. They may be able to help you realize you are still finding love and so is he.
This is your second marriage and your husband’s second marriage. Your ex is clearly out of the picture, you don’t even want to be around him when he visits the kids, if he ever does. You have made a clean break and that’s the way it is going to stay. Your husband, on the other hand, has made the break, legally, but at times it seems difficult to prove by his actions. Your second marriage was the culmination of your efforts at finding love, was his for the same reason?
When he visits to see his kids he seems to be just a little bit too excited. He wants to go alone because the three boys and all their things clutter up the car; you may be crowded and uncomfortable. The delay in returning with his children is shrugged off to them playing around while they were trying to pack and load the car. He returns with a smile on his face and a skip in his step. Your psychic can help you understand these new emotions that are flooding your psyche right now. Are they true or imagination?
The time his ex ended up in the hospital with a broken leg he excused his insistence on being there with her on the boys needing a chaperone. He told you, you could come if you wanted to but you didn’t have to. Even though visiting hours were over at 8:00 PM he seemed to never return home until well after 10:00 PM. What was he doing? Where was he for all that time?
When you approach him with your doubts he accuses you of being insecure, possessive, jealous. He never directly answers your question about where was he for so long he just throws it back at you with something like “Why, don’t you trust me?” It seems he skirts the issue every time simply by comparing your relationship with him with the relationship he once had with her. She never doubted him, she never questioned him, why do you?
Finally, you begin asking yourself the questions; is he still interested in his ex? Has he not been able to let go of his past? Does she still do something for him that he is not getting at home? He always compares this relationship to the one he had with her. Would he rather be with her? Your thoughts bring up strong instinctive emotions of jealousy and possessiveness. You need to know if the worse is true or is it just your imagination?
You are afraid your jealousy will eat away at your relationship with your husband. You are feeling insecure because she, his ex, still seems to have such a hold on him. You hope you really are bending things out of proportion but you can’t know for sure. Your jealousy is instinctive and it will continue to flare up until you can convince yourself there is nothing going on between him and his ex. There are steps you can take to help you understand these feelings and to bring the truth out once and for all.
1) Ask your husband straight out if he still has feelings for his ex. Don’t let him get away with a gruff, angry response that shuts you out. Tell him you are hurting and need his compassion and support. Let him know you don’t want to feel this way but you can’t help it. Ask him to please, just answer you truthfully; do you still feel for her?
2) Insist on going with him whenever he will be in a position to be with his ex. Ignore his seemingly concerned response that you needn’t worry about it, you can stay home. Insist on being with him and meeting the boys with him. You can see for yourself what sort of reception his ex will give him. Hopefully this will ease your mind.
3) Continue to ask him at every occasion, the five W questions; where, who, why, what and when. This is in response to him being gone longer than expected or suggesting he will be gone until late. If he comes home later than normal just ask him the five W questions. If he is guilty he will get angry and not answer. If he is innocent he will take you in his arms and reassure you with the answers you are hoping for. When he says he may not be home until late, tell him you want to go with him; you’ve been in the house all day, you would like a break.
Through your search and your quest for finding love you feel you have been successful. Don’t let it slip away simply because your jealousy has flared to warn you of impending danger. Pay heed to your jealousy but respond to it as well. Control the response and determine the facts before you react. Anything can be nothing. Hopefully your doubts and concerns mean nothing but you will never know unless you find out.