My husband Jim is a loving and funny gentleman, who is loved and admired by all who know him, including his devoted wife. One of the traits that I love about Jim and, which makes me laugh whenever I think about him, is Jim’s ability to guess his surprises. Either he knows me well enough to foresee what I will buy him, or he has extra sensory perception which he carefully disguises. Ever since he was a little kid, however, he has been able to find his christmas presents and discover or guess what was inside of them.. One Christmas, however, Jim’s mother, whose name was Lou, decided to put a stop to his discoveries in order to surprise him with his gifts, by signing her name on his Christmas gifts, so that Jim would think that those packages were for his mother, and he wouldn’t try to guess or find out what was inside. There was a problem with this remedy, however; Lou could not remember what gifts were whose, and she mixed them up!
When it came time to open the presents, Lou opened one package that had her name on it. It turned out to be a present for Jim! As she opened the present, Lou saw that it was a bowling ball, and she said jokingly, ” That’s just what I needed; a new bowling ball!” Lou then opened another package, which contained a pair of bowling shoes, and she said, ” Oh! I got a pair of bowling shoes!” The next gift that she opened was a package that contained a bowling bag, and Lou said, ” That’s just what I needed; a new bowling bag!” Of course the whole family knew that those presents were for Jim and everyone laughed.
On another Christmas Jim’s father , whose name was Earle, decided to play a joke on his wife. He took one of Lou’s panty hose and filled it with several cans of her favorite beer along with cheese balls and candy, and the whole family got a kick out of that, especially Lou who didn’t think that her panty hose would stretch as far as it did ( the panty hose stretched all the way to the floor because of everything that was in it!)
There was another Christmas when Jim’s parents attached a string all the way from the living room to the room where the gift was hiding, so that Jim could not discover his Christmas present, which turned out to be a new motorcycle. Little did his parents know, but Jim discovered his new motorcycle before his parents woke up, and then he attempted to feign his surprise later when the family opened their presents. The only one who saw through Jim was Earle, who was not happy about Jim’s discovery.
I have developed my own ideas to prevent my clever husband from discovering his own Christmas presents. Not only will I hide them in a safe place, but I will wrap his presents in a box, and then I will put that box inside another, and then put that box inside another, so that Jim will have to open many boxes before he can see what is inside. If he can still find out what is inside that box before he reaches the bottom, then I will know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my husband has ESP!