I know you have not asked, but I am sending my Christmas list anyway. Here is what I want for Christmas.
No more government employees. Come on – how many do we need?
The same free health care that my Congressman gets.
Keep your self-importance in perspective. Remember most people just think that politics is show business for ugly people.
Reduce the drinking age to 18. If you cannot do this, pass a law that says 18 year old kids cannot die in Iraq or Afghanistan, cannot vote, cannot drive, and cannot be consider adults by the justice system. At least be fair about it.
High school is too long. Come on – who ever has a productive senior high school year? Make high school two years and then use the money saved to have free college for everyone.
Try a new approach to the “drug war”. If you hadn’t noticed the old one isn’t working.
Try a new approach to immigration. If you hadn’t noticed the old one isn’t working.
Try a new approach to peace in the Middle East. If you haven’t noticed the old one isn’t working.
Quit pretending you can keep spending billions of dollars to end the depression. It didn’t work for Roosevelt. Capitalism has its up and downs. That is life.
Please take a vow that you will go a whole year without talking to a lobbyist who paid big bucks into your campaign coffers.
Accept the fact that we all can live without any new regulations being passed. If you have the urge to pass a regulation, go to a bar and have a drink instead.
It is okay to be human. It is okay to make mistakes. But when caught don’t “find God” and don’t go into rehab. Be honest and say you messed up.
Use a special Congressional Act to put the Cubs in the American League Central. That might be their only chance of winning a playoff spot.
Do away with the IRS and have a national sales tax. The money saved on eliminating the IRS would be millions.
Legalize marijuana and use the tax money to pay for National Health Care.
We have more criminals in jail than any other nation. Including China. You go to jail for violent crimes. If you do white collar crime, you must keep working and every dime you make goes to the people you ripped off. You must live in a half-way house with no luxuries. If you are arrested for drugs, you go to rehab, not jail. If you molest a child, you are castrated.
Who cares about gay marriages? So let them get married. They aren’t hurting anyone. Focus on more important issues – like avoiding wars where we stay for decades and decades. And decades.
You do not know how to run banks or car companies. Come on – you can’t even balance a budget. Let bankruptcy do its job. Capitalism with bankruptcy is like heaven without hell.