Finding yourself and your own ways and religions is really a thing of the past. Door to Door Religious sales are the thing of today.
9 o’clock P.M. EST there was a knock on my apartment door.
“Do you know the word of God ma’am”
“Yes sir I do, I also know that it is really late and I have a toddler asleep in the other room. If you wake her up, you will be praying to God I don’t call the Police on you.”
“This will only take a few minutes.”
“Sir, with all due respect, can you not do your sales pitch at a more appropriate time of day?”
“Ma’am, God is with us all hours of the day and night.”
“Yes, Sir, I could not agree with you more. This is really not appropriate for you to knock at my door at this time of night. Please come back another time.”
“Ma’am, I already have you here, and I believe you are in need of guidance, let’s pray together.”
“Sure, If you will leave, let me start.”
“Dear God, Please understand and forgive me. I am about to sin. I do believe in God, but I believe door to door sales in Your name is wrong. God, Please understand that I do not fear you as others do. I love that you are there for me no matter the time of day. God, I am about to kick this person out of my apartment, be it by physical force or by my words alone, he will leave.”
“Ma’am, That is not a proper prayer.”
“Sir, Prayer is however I want it to be. Prayer is me speaking to God, I do not need YOU or anyone else to tell me I am wrong, and I do not believe that God wants that either.”
“Ma’am, I will pray for you.”
“Go ahead, but please do it from your own home.”
“I will show you how, here and now”
“I am calling the police. You are not welcome here, and are being hostile in my attempts to get you to leave.”
“Ma’am, I only want to share my love of God. I work all day long to share with those in need. Like you ma’am. I want to share with you, my love of the Lord.” Getting LOUDER “I need you to accept my God before I leave.”
Dialing the phone…
“Sir, leave. Do not wake up my daughter. He is OUR god, not yours. I’ll bet you need a payment or something right?”
“Well, for $19.95 I will sign you as a member of our church. You will get full access to God in all his glory. We will pray for you at no additional cost.”
” THE NERVE OF SOME PEOPLE. LEAVE NOW, OR WAIT FOR THE POLICE TO TAKE YOU I DO NOT CARE. I DO NOT NEED YOU TO SELL GOD TO ME…”
“I will leave, but I will be back.”
“No, no you won’t. If you come back I won’t open the door. This is my home. God is with me here. I don’t need to buy the rights to talk to God. I don’t need YOU to tell me I am praying wrong. It is people like you who cause so many to turn away from God.”
“I am a man of God.”
“A true man of God does NOT need money.”
“You called the POLICE? Man you’re a crazy….”
“No sir, I am not.”
“I can’t believe you called the …… police on me.”
“Well, I did warn you!”
Slam….. He attempts to run.
Officer “Thank you ma’am this guy has been ripping people off all over town. Sadly, most people believe that he is legit because of what he is pedaling.”
Not all door to door religious sales persons ask for money, however some just do not understand that they are reaching you at a bad time, or have no regard for your current views. This gentleman was not the only one to come to my door after 9 P.M. and I am sure he won’t be the last.