There are always those stories and rules people should follow before getting married, so that they can live a long and happy life together. But where are these facts and opinions coming from? If somebody has been married before and gives this advice it could mean either they believed it but it failed anyways, or that they’ve learned from their failed marriage and so they’re giving a piece of advice from they’re learning experience. And even if you hear it from somebody that’s been married for fifty years, what works for them might not always work for every other couple. Everybody’s different, so what makes these “rules” still apply for today?
Sex before marriage. Something that parents teach their kids when they start to date, and something some religions still truly believe in. Sure when it comes to getting pregnant it’s always best to be married especially if you have parents that are going to make you marry whoever you get pregnant by, but it doesn’t necessarily mean you should get married just because of having a kid. Because then your going to go through life wondering if the only reason your with this person is because they got pregnant, and not for the real reason of getting married, which is because of love. And seeing as sex is a huge part in a marriage, and one of the main reasons people will get divorced (if one person can’t perform, or one person isn’t into sex the other spouse is more likely to cheat), and so if you don’t know going into it what it’s like in the bedroom, that could lead for problems later on. A great sex life is very important for a marriage because if the sex is great, when you fight you can look forward to make up sex, and you will have less reason to worry about affairs because why would the other person cheat if the sex is great? So having sex before marriage, isn’t a bad thing.
Living together before marriage. This one can go either way. I think it’s best to wait to live together before marriage, because then whatever problems come along you already have that commitment to each other so you work past the small issues like one person doesn’t do the dishes. But if you have lived together without that full commitment for ten years, and then those problems start to bug you because you figure your married now and so it should change, it’s not going to work. I have met a couple once that lived together for a very long time and finally decided to get married, and within two months they were divorced. On the other hand, if you want to know somebody inside and out before getting married, than living together for a few months beforehand wouldn’t be a terrible thing.
I don’t think that these factors are the factors of marriages divorcing or staying together, but I think that understanding these things wouldn’t hurt to look at either.