1.If you fill your car up with gas, you cannot leave your car at the gas pump, while you go in to buy a coke. This makes everyone behind you wait for the gas pump.
2.If you are not making a right turn, why are you in the right turn lane? That means the person behind you, you know the on who wants to turn right, you can tell because he has his blinker ON , has to wait for you and the light to change before he turns right.
3.Do not speed up, cut in front of people, only to jam on your brakes at the red light. These other people might be actually coasting up to the red light, you know actually saving gas, while you are busy racing around like an idiot, cutting in front of people, just to stop at a red light.
4,There is a long line of cars waiting to get on the freeway. You are not special. Do not race ahead to the front of the line and then try to merge at the last possible moment. This makes you look like an ass. Wait in line like everyone else.
5.Cars slide and crash in rain, snow and ice. You cannot go full speed on rainy days when visibility is limited, when the ice is covered with snow or black ice. You are the idiot that goes seventy miles an hour, passes everyone and then we all have to wait, tied up in a traffic jam, while the tow truck pulls you out of the ditch or you block three lanes of traffic after hitting a guard rail and spinning out and crashing into other cars.
6.Walk through a junk yard and look at all the cars. Note the spider web patterns on many of the windshields. These are caused by people too dumb to wear seatbelts. That is where their heads met the windshield. By the way, hitting your head against a windshield in a car accident is like being dropped from an eight-story building. Not too promising for your future. Unless you like sitting in a wheelchair and drooling.
7,It is a car. Not an extension of your penis. Don’t be aggressive. A car is no place to prove your manhood. There are over six million crashes a year. Many caused by idiots who drive aggressively.
8.Do not text while driving. It is worth than driving drunk. And the ten drivers lined up behind you at the stop light get pissed when they all miss the green light because you were texting .
9.Your car has a back seat. This is like a bed. If you are drunk, use the back seat and go to sleep. When you are sober, in the morning , you can drive. If you think the back seat is uncomfortable to sleep on, try a jail cell. Or a hospital bed. Or a coffin.
10.Your neck actually swivels. Isn’t that amazing? Turn your neck and check your blind spot before changing lanes. Since you failed to use your blinker, it is the least you can do. Also use that special swivel feature your neck has to check behind you when backing up.
Bonus Tip: Read newspaper stories about teenagers who get killed in car crashes. It seems most of these kids die after 12 at night. Go home, do not drive after 12. Driving after 12 p.m. increases your chances of getting killed.