Different Types Of Love Seekers
Some people are always looking for that Mr. or Mrs. Right. Some people are married unhappily, but don’t stay together to work on it so they can grow old together, they just don’t want to be alone. Others will hop from one “relationship” to another, constantly “falling in love” with one after another when the current fails. Some people are not looking to fall in love, but are forever on a conquest to see if they can bed the person who gives them the brush. Some people are married, but cheat on their spouses, either physically or emotionally. By emotionally, I mean by becoming emotionally attached to one of the opposite sex. While there is no sex involved, I feel like this is even more hurtful than if there was a one night stand, an indiscretion with no attachment. Then of course there are the business arrangement seekers. Not necessarily gold diggers, but men or women who know life would be much easier financially with two instead of one income. There are those who truly find their one and only, their true love. These two people wed and stand together through thickness and thin. They stay together and nurture each other through all times trying or not. Unfortunately, they are also a rare occurrence. it does happen, just not as often as it should. All of these types of love seekers are considered the norm and never questioned about their lifestyle choice.
What people Think And Say When You Choose To Be Single
I find it odd that all of the above are rarely subjected to questioning of their mental stability, or thought of as bitter because of their choices. Except of course the true love birds, they deserve kudos, and usually get them. However, if you decide that you want to stay single for any certain amount of time that exceeds say six months (just an off the wall example) you are questioned, told you are bitter about something, or as egotistical as my ex-husband said: “Need to get over it.” I say egotistical not to be mean, but for him to assume I am choosing to remain single right now because of our past is outright ridiculous, after all I left him in1999, and have had two serious relationships, and have dated my fair share since then.
When I Decided To Forgo The Dating Scene
About a year ago, I just tired of the dating game. Actually it was long before that but I continued to date believing what others were saying. Things like: “you are too young to want to be alone” or compliments to my looks basically saying I have no reason not to date because after all I’m not ugly. I have to say that one is the best! But finally about a year ago after dating someone and finding they were not at all what I thought they were, and this was a man I saw on a daily basis for two years, I think I had had it. I decided I just wanted to spend time with my children as much as I could, my son was (and is) the only one left living at home. I have enjoyed this year immensely. I enjoy spending time with myself, my son and my new granddaughter.
Not Banning The Love Scene Forever
I am not saying I will never date, or perhaps even fall in love someday. You never know, it may even be tomorrow when that person walks into my life. In the meantime though, it would be nice for people to understand not only is it OK to choose to be alone, it can be very healthy. A lot healthier is some introspection and figuring out who you really are and what you really would like in your significant other than jumping from one person to the next proclaiming “I’m in love!” from month to month.
What I’ve gained During This Past Year
A true sense of who I am for one. Precious time with my son before he too moves on to make his mark on the world. On the days I don’t feel well, I don’t have to worry that I am dragging someone else down, or holding them back. On my good days I get to expand my energy in doing things for myself. Doing things that make me feel good.
An Overwhelming Sense Of Love
My daughter is very lucky. Most people will claim she is too young, but she is wise far beyond her years. At nineteen she is with a man who absolutely truly loves her. She absolutely truly loves him too. They fit together like pieces of a puzzle. I have never seen two people compliment each other as they do, they truly belong together. They were blessed with an angel of a baby August 31, 2009. My granddaughter. Because I can no longer work outside the home I am lucky enough to have her everyday except weekends. Of course from day one I loved this little bundle of joy, just as I do my very own. For some reason today though, it hit me what a pure love a baby has. As she gazed into my eyes and smiled her gummy smile, I thought this is the definition of pure and unconditional love. I decided to do a slide show to share some pictures of the purest love, and that will follow, probably tomorrow.
I know this isn’t my typical writing, and may even make some people a little uncomfortable as it is so personal, but I just wanted to share this experience with my friends. I also would like to stand up for others who feel as I do, that just want to spend a little time on their own. Perhaps this can also serve as a mirror for the offending people who decide anyone who chooses being single are just not right in the head, or heart. Most of the offenders are actually well meaning, but it is still offensive just the same.So by seeing this article, perhaps they will stop and think before the words come out of their mouths, well meaning or not.
Just remember, its healthier to retreat to oneself than to hop from bed to bed, or fall in love every other week, or cheat on their significant others, or stay miserable instead of alone.
Please see the Slideshow it really says it all without words!